GHETTO BlastHer - #187

LaShonda Tyrelle Wilkins was born on the wrong side of the tracks, literally, they had to roll her mamma off the 401 Seattle Express crossing. Born with a diamond tooth and a sly look in her eyes, little Lashonda spent her childhood riding the rails from town to town with her mom and six brothers, picking up survival tricks and different skills from her ‘uncles’. From ‘Uncle’ Ray in Ashcroft, Tae Kwon Doe, ‘Uncle’ Jim in Cranbrook , lock picking, and ‘Uncle’ Delmar in Pemberton, 101 uses of dental floss. It all came in handy at 16, when she was accidentally left behind while changing trains in Vancouver.

Lashonda, began a lucrative career at the Lusty Clam, first in the kitchen, eventually working her way to most requested dancer of the Slam Clam Girlie Hour. Behind the scenes she was disgusted at how women were treated, vowing to fight back wherever she could. One night leaving work, she happened upon a pimp beating up a girl, and her wrath was unleashed. She beat the feathers out of his big purple pimp hat and he fled, spitting out gold teeth, screaming “YOU GHETTO BITCH, BLAST YOU”. The legend of Ghetto BlastHer was born.

Ghetto eventually outgrew the Lusty Clam and became a renowned dancing “ho” in videos by the likes of Ficticous G and Little Blingfinger. Video bootey shaker by day---vigilante by night, Ghetto prowled alleys and clubs, laying the smack down on groping hands and flying fists, rescuing girls from predicaments with an uncanny resourcefulness that would shame MacGuyver.

Eventually Ghetto needed a new challenge, somewhere else to channel her fury. Fortunately for the Riot Girls, Ghetto happened to catch a recruitment ad for Roller Derby…..simply kismet.